Letter to the Editor: A Postdiluvian Christmas


‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the house….Oh wait! We don’t have a house! Start that again:

‘Twas the week before Christmas and all through the rental,
we were all really sick..both physical and mental.
Our flooded houses stood empty on streets that were bare,
in hopes that our government soon would be there.

The children were shell shocked and out of their heads,
with visions of storms that now they would dread.
Mama with her tea cup and chatting with friends
who loved her to pieces and helped her to mend.

When all over Facebook there arose such a clatter:
The government is lying! These people don’t matter!
Away to the computer to add to that truth
and endeavor to do it with accuracy and couth.

The letters were written, the calls they were made,
two hundred thousand…that’s what you said!
We knew we’d be better once that money came through.
It wouldn’t be easy but we sure could make do!

We’d pay off our mortgages and buy a new couch,
our banks would sure help us with our friends to vouch.
We would slowly be whole and put this horror behind.
Thank goodness for disaster relief and a government so kind!

So Terry and Robert, Jean, Tom and Karen!
Tricia and James and Ashley and Robin!
And all of you others there’s no need to worry!
The government’s working and they’re in such a hurry!

We’ll take care of your families and return you to normal
there’s just a few steps to make it all formal.
Throw out your stuff and find some new digs
while we have a few meetings and sort a few things.

Now the week before Christmas we’ve all had our meetings
Hi, they all said, come sit here and greetings!
We know this has been hard and we think you’ll be pleased,
we will make you an offer to put you at ease.

You can fix up your house with a minimal amount
or we’ll buy you out, your house worth won’t count.
We know we have taxed your house at top dollar
but now we owe you, we can’t show much valor.

We low-balled your contents, your houses, your worth.
We think you’d be grateful, it was a lot of work!
We know that Fort Mac was better than this
but you live in Cape Breton, you know how that is!

We love you all dearly and want you to heal
but that’s all we have, that’s your raw deal.
Don’t try to write us or to call our hot lines,
we have made our decision — go decorate your pines.

You don’t deserve more but we won’t tell you why.
You’ll just have to trust us when your houses we buy.
We’ll tear them down nicely then fix up the land.
We’ll sell it to Cecil whose plans will be GRAND!

We said why won’t you listen? It won’t help us move on!
We’ve lost so much more than our buildings and lawns!
We lost our possessions, our grounding, our anchor!
We’ll all be bankrupt! We just can’t be franker.

Our lives are destroyed and our spirits are weary.
This Christmas season is really quite dreary.
You have the power to make a bad event good.
If it was your own family we know that you would!

So do the right thing and treat us with kindness.
Don’t let the bean counters lead you to blindness.
You have the resources to help all of us out
But you just say NO and won’t listen to our shouts!

Do the right thing this Christmas and show some compassion
Your fellow Nova Scotians took quite a lashing!
We don’t want a million just a few thousand more,
then we can breath easy ‘cause we won’t be so poor!